Friday, October 14, 2011

Stuck In Reverse


And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Its been awhile and I'm in the middle of final exam for this year. People been asking why I didn't update at all. I can't find much reason, just my life had been duller than before, recently. Literally, I need to cut my head to clear things up. I need to tear up my body to give some treatment to my heart, it is always this hard whenever it comes to this time of year. October hasn't been nice to me, since 2008. 24th of October to be specific.

How I am suppose to act all strong the whole year, when I actually need someone to tell me what to do and what I cannot do? Like all other teens. I am scared of growing older. But day by day, I am. I need someone to talk to, when I got home and I said "ayah, tadi sekolah.."

I need you all these years.

I said I am okay. but when I act wrongly, I just need you to say things you used to say, just like before. I need to hear it, again.

How I am suppose to act all tough? No, I am not.

I actually chose to write and essay for final exam, write a story ending with : "he walked away without saying a word." cause I am thinking bout you, but I rewrote it, cause I can't handle.

I can't handle, but to miss you and tears on my face are nothing, I can't see you anymore. All I can say is as simple as I miss you. Sorry I haven't been such I good daughter for you recently.

Sigh, I am not suppose to whining. I am not suppose to. I am strong. He trusted me, so why can't I?


Anonymous said...

stay strong kakak :')

Mizz Palin Ribena said...

my dear tieka,
i experienced the same situation like yours
pray for him and be a good daughter
thats all you can do :)

Ateika said...

thanks rabie :)

kak palin : okay! thanks kak :D